There are days I look back to when I was swallowing pills and hoping I wouldn’t make it to morning, and I wish I had succeeded. There is an emptiness with in me that at times are to large to ignore. I look at the people in my life and think they would be happier without me. I don’t feel like I am an improvement in their life.
There are days I look at my life and am so happy it’s all changed and is brighter and happier, yet I still want to lay down and sleep. Like I just can’t fully enjoy it. I look around and wonder what’s the point of all of this? The up’s and downs of life, the good, the bad and the ugly. Why do we suffer so much for the little bit of happy we get to barely enjoy before another course of suffering.