Still stuck at a stand still.

She kissed me. I loved her soft lips. But the attraction wasn’t there. Don’t get me wrong she is beautiful. And right in so many ways. But I’ve been broken. I can’t move forward and I am afraid I will pick the wrong person to allow myself to fall in love with again.
Just when I am ready to possibly let things start warming up he fuck messages me. To ask how we’re doing? My guess is he likes to see the the dissolution he’s caused. He last lady went mental too if I remember correctly. Her brother was asking for his help because she was out of hand. Anyway he messaged me. And I am so angry about it. Why reopen a wound? He knew how much pain I am in. Why make me hurt more? When I asked him to speak for himself, wants time to make a better truth. Wtf? Fuck him.


19 thoughts on “Still stuck at a stand still.

  1. He’s still trying to keep u holding on… don’t blame him ur an awesome person… she kissed u?! Is it going slow at the pace u want? What made her different then the other person u were holding out on in a post i read awhile back?


    • She is no different. I am finding myself being blatantly rude to make her go away but she purist.

      Matter of fact, I was just talking with a friend about when you look into someone’s eyes and there is a seriously strong sexual tension. Well I had it with the last potential partner But not the new lady trying to win over my heart. Although I sure do love looking at her lips. 😉


      • Of course BPD makes things hurt so much more.
        I want to be alone for awhile. But I am so lonely and in need of affection. But I can’t trust my heart even with a little of it. I don’t want to be touched because then it will reach in to my soul and rip me from my safe space.


      • Maybe being ripped from your “safe” place will help u so u can move on from the dude that hurt ur fragile heart.. I know it would be easy to love u even with ur flaws whatever they may be.. let a good person in!! Ur last potential was a good person it seems… maybe u should have let them in…


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s