Yesterday was an enlightening day for me. I am starting to understand that everyone has problems. I know this is common sense but for a borderline this is an abstract thought. My day yesterday was heavily peppered with people from my life. Distant past to very present. My understanding if my place in this world and the very existence of the being I am.
Let me back up…. every new beginning I proclaim, as most borderlines do, this is the real me. As I reinvent myself looking for what feels right. I am now realizing all these realities ARE truly me. Every morph into a new me, is me revising my outward expression of the growth I’ve experienced within. Learning how to stand strong in how I real feel and being ok with sharing that with those around me.
Anyway, seeing and talking to people from my past confirms that that time of my life was real and authentic. I may not have been complete yet but evolution has brought me closer to the authentic me.
So looking back and over my life with the people who’ve come and gone I have a better understanding that we are truly all stumbling through this learning as we go. And with this understand comes the inability to hate anyone.
I’ve learned all my villains where victims in someone elses life, before they became the villain in mine.
I also am now realizing without all I have been through, dispite how tragic, it’s brought me to my present authentic me. And I kind of love her the most.