Whatever

Full disclosure. ..I am drunk.
Not often but right now.
Not drunk text or message or even cat calls at the bar. Just drink.  My best

friend and her man walked home. He was waisted.  Maybe I should have walked but I felt  fine till I laid in bed. 3 &1/2 drinks. 

I am lost.  Waiting for someone to give me direction. My own mentor will barley speak or look at me. What have I done?  I don’t know what to do. I would give up if things weren’t great with my oldest and my youngest didn’t need me.  I’d be ready to check out. But nothing seems to line up right to make it ok. Guess I still have too work at it. ..Fuck.  I am drunk and I want him. Fuck I hate him. I can’t move on. I can’t move.  Fuck everything.

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