What it does to a person…..I am no expert but I can tell you I am suffering. 

I sift through dating apps till I can’t any more. I’ve lost all interested in even trying. Why bother, talks never pan out to anything anyway.

Sometimes I get desperate and look at Craigslist but never write anyone as most have no pictures. 

I work in malls and sometimes I walk around when I am slow. It only makes me want to cry. People everywhere holding eachothers hands laughing and smiling.  

When I do on the rare occasions talk to someone,  I look for a reason it won’t work and then stop putting out the effort. 

I am lonely and afraid. Afraid of investigation time into something that will only hurt me later. Afraid of the wasted time it would take away from my life. I am afraid of rejection. I am not good enough. I feel like a fraud in my own life.

I want to give up. Delete all my profiles. Shut my phone off and disappeare. …end the charade. Who am I fooling anyway.


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